And then there were none

My stovetop is a piece of crap. Has been since day one. Since the day I found the underneath on fire at the wire connection, it has been a source of growling in my life.

One day a few years ago, Top Right Burner started heating only on high. Even if the dial was on number 1, still cooking at searing hot temp. Lovely.

Middle Downtake fan decided after later that it no longer wanted to pull anything away from the cooking surface. Fine, I thought. I don’t need you anyway. I’ve got my paper fan.

Then Top Left Burner came unhooked one day and as I tried to push it back into place, began to spark in my face. Lovelier.

Bottom Left Burner did exactly the same thing but after I tried to push it back into place, would only cook on Medium temp no matter where the dial was. Even better.

So only Dependable Bottom Right Burner worked on all heat settings. I gave it lots of praise and worship and told it how much I appreciated it doing such a great job whilst the others were slackers. Until last week.

I had cooked dinner on the stovetop with no issues and wiped up. In my cleaning, I turned on the fan button. Reading above, one would suspect that that means nothing since it didn’t work.

However, this day it decided to come alive. And it didn’t fool around. It came back to life so badly, that it almost started another fire.

Thomas came home and I was watching The Daily Show, lost in laughter. He went in the kitchen for water and came back and said, “I smell something weird in the kitchen.” I’m a confident woman so I know it had nothing to do with my cooking.

We both went in and sure enough, the fan was overheating and creating that lovely electrical fire smell. The fan had been running non-stop for at least an hour. Ok, so just turn off the fan. Tried. Nope. The fan had become possessed and would not shut off. Finally, we had to turn it off from the box.

So now I have NO stovetop. No Top Right Burner that cooks only on high. No Top Left Burner that tried to shock me. Nothing.

I am now cooking on a double-burner hot plate. Awesome. And don’t ANYONE say “Remodeling the Kitchen” or I will completely go bald in one fail swoop.

Another Opening, another show!

“Tale as old as Time …….”

Felix’s second show, “Beauty and The Beast” rehearsal began the first of the year. 

She auditioned in December and danced her way into the show’s ensemble. Meaning, she would be a villager and a dancing, singing enchanted servant that is now a candle. Or napkin. Or dinner plate. Any of those choices means a crazy costume. She ended up being a knife.

 

In the meantime, I volunteered to decorate the lobby … again. Yeah nuts, eh?  I had in my mind to make a castle facade, complete with stone wall and ivy and cut out stone turrets. The director asked me if I could paint stones on scenery and I was like, “Phtttt. Of course. Doesn’t everyone in Theater?”

In truth, I had never painted stones. I’ve made lots of linen flats, painted walls, etc., but actually painted stones with shading? Never. But I figured I could and I wasn’t going to let him know I hadn’t ever done it. I really wanted to decorate the lobby.

The O Holy Internet allowed me to see what a shaded painted stone looked like and I went from there. Those in charge would ask me how it was going but because I tend to (tend to - HA! try the word “always”) work to a deadline, I really hadn’t even begun to construct ANYTHING until four days before the show. I had done several drawings of what I wanted but actual building and painting was done Saturday, Sunday, and Tuesday (I was too pooped from kiddie watching to paint on Monday night) and then we hauled it in Wednesday morning, with the opening being on Friday.

Yeah, to the deadline. That’s how we roll.

Thomas and I set out for good ol’ Home Depot for our supplies: large Styrofoam boards, paint, wood for framing, etc. He and I worked pretty much all day Saturday getting the big pieces put together and then I based painted everything for the next step: the stones.

Behind every foam piece, is Thomas’ handy work of framing. Had it not been for him, I’m not sure how I would have attached all the pieces. Thanks Hubby!

I discovered the best-est invention EVER (next to already shredded cheese in a bag)  -  The Hot Knife. Yeah baby, it’s HOT. I mean, it’s really hot. It’s a piece of metal, hooked to a high heater that slices through Styrofoam like it was budda. If you’ve ever tried to cut Styrofoam with anything sharp, the crap flies everywhere and the cut is really poor. This amazing little thing melts it away and cuts those pieces which in turn, made them look like stones.

Downside to this knife -  I’m pretty sure I now have Mesothelioma from breathing in the Styrofoam fumes even though I cut it outside. Crap, that was awful. But, it’s all for the Theater and the show must go on --- even if I’m coughing up blood.

 

Archway which will connect the two turrets.

I painted the front of the flat in base color, light grey. First I drew the lines with a thick Sharpie, not too perfect as they are stones. Don’t forget a window.

With “dry brush” (which just means get paint on the brush, brush the wet off on something else, then use the dryer brush for painting), I lightly brushed black on a side and the bottom of the stones. Shading. Also, dabbed lightly over each stone with the dry brush for added stony texture. Painted the window black since it’s  a facade. No need for a real window.

Added a gold embellishment on the two ends of the archway (Thomas’ touch). Also a little ivy crawling up the walls with some flowers.

  Finished product!

Strapped gently in the trailer and ready to go ………… and it starts to freakin’ snow. Really?? Great. So we have to unload in the snow. Luckily it’s very light and the director sends for some of his students to help us.

 

Set up in the lobby. I finished sewing the curtain at midnight on Tuesday. The rug came from the prop room which added just the right touch in the entry way.

My hope was that the cast would take pictures with audience members in front of this facade – which, on opening night – is exactly what they did. I was so happy. I need to get a finished pic of this because there’s two chairs in front and up-lighting from the bottom.

Anyway, I’m very happy with the finished product. And I can finally swallow again (nervous lump in my throat is gone) and watch my Lovely Dancing Knife in peace.

I’m a very proud Drama Mama.